Sunday, May 13, 2012


There are a thousand things that I have learned from my mother.
I've learned to be dedicated about the things I care about.  I've  learned to always clean the water droplets off the sink faucet before company comes over. I've learned that sometimes sitting and listening to your daughter late into the night can be the best medicine (and all other heartbreak calls for a trip to the mall). She taught me how to rock my newborn to sleep and how to love in such a selfless and passionate way.

Now that I'm a mom I realize how easy she made it look. I see some mothers with  creative minds, challenging careers, beautiful homes, perfect figures and polite perfect children and I wonder what I'm missing. My house is littered with toys, instruments, art projects and books. Marley could be dressed in a full body princess garb or completely nude running around like a crazy child depending on what time of day you catch me at. But I'm learning that its the twists and turns of our individual strengths and weaknesses that create our own imperfectly perfect stories. You see, its easy to figure out the way you want your life to look but its another thing to evaluate the things you're willing to give up in order to live that way. I want a creative, spontaneous, passionate life. So sometimes that means an overflowing laundry basket, a sink full of dishes and a few shower-less days. Sometimes that means little routine, paint on my carpets, and a whole lot of untouched "to-do" lists. As moms we need to know... Its ok. Its ok to nap when your kid naps. It's ok to not make all your child's food from scratch. It's ok to not always have the answers. Sometimes we just need to bathe for a while in those words. Its ok. You're doing an amazing job. Don't compare yourself to anyone around you because your children, your parenting and the things that are hard for you, and the things that come naturally to you are unique and perfect and created by God. Relish in them and embrace them. 

So thank you to all the moms who paved the way before me. Thank you to my own mom for always being willing to help me when I'm frazzled and bewildered.  Thank you to Bryan and Marley for always making me feel like I am the best mommy in the world even though sometimes I feel like that is the furthest thing from the truth. Thank you for all the help, for allowing me to nap or a shower when i need it desperately, and for showing me a good amount of grace and love along the way. 

I am so thankful for my life. For the oppurtunity to be a mom to my beautiful, vibrant minded daughter. You keep me on my toes. You keep a glow in my heart and a smile on my face. I love you tremendously. 

Friday, May 11, 2012

Meet Earl, my sexy new mandolin that my husband just bought me. Its been so fun (and painful) to play around with! 

sunkissed skin and baby soups

These pictures that I take, each one has its own separate story that stays tightly bound to it, and it will replay in my head when I look long enough to go back to that time and place. It helps me remember exactly what was unfolding right before the shutter closed. I remember the reason I thought to take the photo. When i take a picture I'm almost always doing it to try and remember something, embedding my emotions into a photo and knowing I will get to always visit the experience for as long as I have the image. 

When I look at the pictures above I remember a perfect day. We sprawled out in our "baby soups" (bathing suits) after chasing each other with the hose, huddled close on our towels letting the sun dry our skin. I remember the little water droplets falling off your pretty little lashes while talked. We squeezed our own lemons and you pushed all the buttons on the blender to crush up the strawberries for what was to be our very first pitcher of homemade lemonade. I remember sitting on the floor later that night, sneaking bites of ice cream straight from the container and giggling about our brain freezes and exploding mouths. I love our little moments together and the conversations we have and the way we play. Sometimes I don't care about that rule that says "If i'm your mother i cant be your friend", because you're my BEST friend and sometimes I wish I didn't have to be your mom. I wish I never had to punish you and that I could just enjoy all the 
amazing sides of you without all the hard complicated stuff.

I wish you could remember these days when you had so much fun right in our own backyard, when it first turned warm and sunny and when the air smelled like fresh cut grass. I wish you could remember that you splashed around in chilly hose water and slid down our little cheap slip and slide for hours. I wish you could remember Bryan and I sitting and watching here with big smiles. I cant wait for you to look through these photos someday and catch a glimpse of the emotions I felt on the other end of the camera. 

This little yard will always hold big memories for me.

Friday, May 4, 2012

sunshine and rain

 The weather has been bipolar again. 
 We've spent the warm days outside or at the beach. I brought out a plastic tub we had laying around and filled it with water and toys and Marley has spent every second she can in it!
The cold days have been scattered with crafts, friends and lounging around in our pajamas all day.
Bryan and I have decided to cut out all refined sugars, carbonated drinks, breads and processed foods. Although it was hard at the start, we have absolutely loved the results! We've also been exercising almost every day and our bodies feel so energized and clean!  I've really been having fun cooking with all organic foods and challenging myself to use healthy substitutes in my cooking.  Healthy food can actually taste amazing! Here's to a long and healthy life!!
Mango Chicken, Roasted Brussel Sprouts, Salad and Apples with Cinnamon.
Mashed Cauliflower and a Turkey burger made with egg whites, onion, a sprinkle of mozerella and mushrooms. Cauliflower mash garnished with Zucchini
Baked Apple filled with homemade apple sauce and oats. I made cookies with the leftovers!
yum. these delicious artichokes from my parents house were eaten for dinner!
We also made the switch to all bpa free products. Lifefactory has awesome all glass bottles that have worked great! Nike training App is an amaaaazzzing way to work out as a mom. I dont have time to go to the gym, but i do have time during marley's nap to have my own personal trainer walk me through my exercises! 

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